One of those parenting moments I’ve been dreading happened on Tuesday night. My daughter asked me if I had a bikini like the character in Brooklyn. I admitted that I didn’t and pointed out that the character in question wore a one-piece bathing suit.

Her Majesty pipes up from the backseat. “I like one-piece suits better because bikinis make me look fat.”

I almost slammed on the brakes as I drove home from softball practice in the rain. “What?”

She shrugged and said matter-of-factly, “I don’t like bikinis. They make me look fat.”

A million memories flitted through my mind. From age eighteen months through at least seven, Her Majesty could almost always be seen in a bikini. Even when it’s Christmas and so cold you need socks. I had to beg the child to put on proper clothing to go to school, for heaven’s sake!

So, there I sat knowing that I’d just lost something. More importantly, my nine-year-old little girl had just lost something. Goodness knows, I was not ready for puberty and all of the pernicious things it does to a little girl’s psyche.

“I need to lose some weight,” she said.

I didn’t have to ask where she’d heard that one.

Instead I did what I hope was the right thing. I said, “You know, you have to learn to love yourself the way you are before you’ll ever lose any weight. You can’t think about diet and exercise as punishment because that’ll never work.”

I could’ve added, “And I know because I’ve tried” but I didn’t. I probably will someday.

Taking a deep breath, I continued, “Think of exercise and eating right as taking care of yourself.”

This wasn’t the answer she was looking for, though, because she changed the subject completely. I beat myself up while she chattered about Harry Potter. I had hoped that I’d plied her baby self with enough fruits and vegetables and lean meats that she wouldn’t end up with her mother’s body type. Alas, genetics cannot be overcome.

Speaking of those genetics, I was bemoaning them as I headed to the treadmill the next day. Despite my lofty advice about thinking of diet and exercise as taking care of oneself, I was muttering under my breath. After all, I’d given up alcohol for Lent and still managed not to lose a single, solitary pound.

I stopped short.

The physician needed to heal herself.

I told myself that I would go for a run because I needed to exercise my heart and lungs. I told myself that I would fix a smoothie afterwards because I needed more fruits and vegetables. And what do you know? It was easier to make that three miles instead of just thirty minutes. It was easier to drink that smoothie—wait, no, I can’t lie to you. The smoothie is disgusting, but I’m drinking it because I’m cheap. I only have two more packets go. Just make your smoothies out of spinach leaves and mixed berries—so much tastier than whatever this prepackaged concoction from Costco is.

But I digress.

Be kind. Take baby steps. It’s so easy to look out and see other people eating whatever they want and looking all skinny and then get mad—at yourself, at the world, at fate. Then, if you’re like me, you eat something you ought not because you’re mad about the unfairness of it all, and that’s counterproductive. Are you exercising for your general health and well being or are you trying to attain some ideal that’s impossible and probably airbrushed or photoshopped? Are you trying to eat meals that get you the vitamins and minerals that you need or are you falling prey to convenience? These are the questions to ask yourself.

Oh, and if you figure out how NOT to get mad at a world that allows some people to eat nachos and drink beer with reckless abandon while remaining skinny, please let me know your secret.

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For today’s little piece of pragmatism I thought I’d talk about fast food because I’m often running around like a chicken with its head cut off and find myself hungry on the go. Here are a couple of meals that will do in a pinch. As Cookie Monster would tell you, these are SOMETIMES foods, so don’t go crazy.

McDonald’s Egg McMuffin (300 calories, 13g of fat)

Chick-Fil-A Chicken Minis (280 calories, 11g of fat)

Taco Bell Bean Burrito (376 calories, 11g of fat)

McDonald’s hamburger (250 calories, 8g of fat)

McDonald’s fruit and yogurt parfait (150 calories, 3g of fat)

McDonald’s vanilla cone (170 calories, 4.5g of fat)

Chick-fil-a grilled 8 count nuggets (220 calories, 8g of fat) —can pair with salads or fruit

Johnny’s Pizza, slice of cheese pizza (327 calories, 10g of fat)

Pollo Tropical small tropchop with chicken, lettuce, peppers & onions (340 calories, 7g of fat)

Obviously, one cannot live on fast foods such as this—the sodium and preservatives alone would kill you—but in the interest of baby steps it’s far better to eat around 300 calories than to eat whatever you want with reckless abandon, right? These are some of my favorites, but you should check out some medical professionals over at WebMD.

Current fitness status: Better flexibility and balance from yoga, can run for 3.1 miles again. Nary a pound lost nor gained. Still trying to figure out my feels about this vegetable protein, and, no, I haven’t got that body fat monitor yet. I’ll get there….eventually.

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You can always send me suggestions on Twitter, Facebook or through my website at SallyKilpatrick.com. Until we meet again, do at least one thing healthy—you deserve it!

– Sally Kilpatrick